My Christmas Musings

I have not blogged for some 3 weeks now but it's not because I haven't had much to write about. On the contrary, so many things are happening that I'm literally spoilt for choice..... However, I think I shall let those thoughts stay afloat somewhere while I draw upon Christmas celebrated in a Catholic church.

To me, Christmas has evolved over the years at different phases of my life. As a teenager, it was about parties, presents and meeting people. As a young adult, it was about more parties, more presents and meeting more people. Then in the 90s, attending Christmas musicals, Christmas dramas, Singing-Christmas-Trees and hyped up Christmas services became the rage for any believer worth his salt. But sadly, none of these brought Christ into Christmas for me.

This year, I attended my first Christmas Eve Mass as a Catholic. As with all Masses, it was a liturgical celebration and solemn in its own right. There were no techni-colour musical drama, no special effects and no charismatic preacher jumping up and down to make his point. In other words, no frills.

But the church was packed to the gills with nary a standing room. People came 2 hours early to await the celebration of our Lord's birth. Why would people wait up to 2 hours for an hour's Mass without fanfare? What is it about the Catholic celebration that draws parishioners even without the aplomb?

Day of Obligation aside, I believe it's because Christ is revered as the centre of the Mass. He is the focus of our celebration; not the choir, not the drama, not the songs, not the church decorations and not even the preacher.

The homily of this particular Christmas Eve Mass strikes a chord with me. It talks about how Jesus is born 5 times during the Mass. Firstly in the placing of the symbolic baby in the crib, secondly in the exaltation of the songs, thirdly in the gospel reading, fourthly in the transubstantiation of the bread and wine, finally and most importantly, in our partaking of the Eucharist. Taking the bread which has become the body of Christ is truly God's grace for us to live in communion with Him and our neighbour. We thus bring Jesus away to our home, our workplace and into our relationship with the world.

I would not call myself 'godly' by any standards. No, not by a long shot. I still have a very long way on this straight and narrow path. I have fallen many times. I have given in to temptations at the drop of a hat. I have hurt others either wittingly or unwittingly. I have failed myself and God all too often.

But I am comforted that I can take Jesus away with me through this Sacrament of the Holy Eucharist. It is a grace bestowed upon us freely and abundantly........one which we do not deserve but receive only because of love.

And that, to me, is the reason of Christmas.

Hazing at JC

My colleague's daughter has been accepted into a prestigious JC of her choice. While the mood at home has been celebratory, the mother is now worried about the culture at junior colleges after the fiasco of hazing at ACJC.

Maybe I'm really getting older....or perhaps youngsters these days are really taking it to the max. A popular student at her JC, this girl was hazed & ragged on her birthday by friends who threw cake, milk and water at her face; followed by a birthday song. Duh??

Eons ago, I was just as bright-eyed and enthusiastic to embrace JC life as it signified 'coming-of-age' and breaking away from highly structured secondary school life. Stressful it might be academically; the independence, freedom and wide array of activities could really bowl one over.

For a 'sua-ku' like me, JC life really opened a world of fun moments in school with friends and even teachers. I remember my teachers as friends and had lunch with them occasionally. The best part was that we were old enough to be treated like young adults but young enough to get away with most pranks..........definitely more interesting than life in the university.

There was an incident which, as I recall now, am awfully glad did not take place. I shudder to imagine the implications and consequences if we had gone ahead with our ill-conceived plan that night.

An active committee member of my school's Interact Club, we organised a lot of intercollegiate events among the participating JCs and sometimes with the Rotary Club. My school had to play host to one such event, a 2-day camp at our school compound one weekend. Touted as a teambuilding activity, it was an overnight stay with Interact Club members and teachers from CJC and ACJC as well.

You can imagine the ruckus and brouhaha created by a bunch of active, exuberant, fun-loving teenagers - not from 1 JC but 3! It was generally good, clean and youthful fun. Teachers who facilitated the event did not have much to worry about; until night fell and part of the agenda was to visit a cemetery.....

Many students were raring to go but some of us had our reservations. Yes, I was very worried because it just did not seem right. But I was a teenager then, eager to fit in and belong; never wanting to seem a prude. Did I raise my objections? No, I just kept quiet and hoped God would be with us!

By His grace, we did not go through with the plan. For that, I heaved a sigh of relief that night. Now, after so many years and knowing all the possible implications, I really thank God for his hand on this bunch of naive teenagers even then. To this day, I still feel the sting of being a coward.

Being a JC student is indeed fun but one has to know his limits. Throwing a surprise birthday party is great but to subject the person to such pranks is contradicting the word 'celebrate'. In a birthday context, 'celebrate' means to make merry, toast, hold festivities so the person feels happy.

From the article and pictures, the girl was neither laughing nor enjoying it. I think it is a celebration taken too far. And this opinion is coming from someone who had thoroughly enjoyed her JC life.

Books I used to love and books I now love...

An avid reader, I read at every possible opportunity and occasion. There will always be a book on my desk, in my bag or in my hand.

I used to love legal thrillers and have read all of John Grisham's works from legal to suspense to psychological genres. My favourite has to be 'The Firm' but it's not because Tom Cruise acted in its movie version. No sir, definitely not!

'The Firm' is my first John Grisham book; I came across it while in the States back in '92 when it just emerged fresh from the publisher's oven. I fell in love with Grisham's writing style and sharp insight into the legal world. As they say..............the rest is history.

I think we can all identify with the plot of being caught in a situation where everything seems too good and dandy to be true. When the crunch comes and we are caught between a rock and the deep blue sea....what do we do then? Do we take the easy way out or do we take the courageous way? Stifle your conscience or face the music and be true to yourself?

I also loved books by Joy Fielding and Sandra Brown. Women authors, it has been said, possess a more intuitive approach to women protagonists. They are able to draw upon their own lives, perspectives and weave their characters much like themselves with a myriad of underlying emotions and motivations.

But since my RCIA journey, I've stopped reading. For starters, I could not find the time to read. Secondly, I began to instinctively stay away from these works whose plots are choked full of malice, violence and deception.

My priest recommended us this book "Introduction to the Devout Life" by St Francis De Sales. Not one to read self-help books, biographies or non-fiction literature, I was however, hooked by this book from the first page! Written in the 16th century, this spiritual classic is so precise, compassionate, straightforward and modern, it seems to be speaking to me here and now!

Just recently, I also came across this book "A friend like Henry" by Nuala Gardner. It is a remarkable true story of how a boy and his family, lost in the world of severe autism saw the silver lining at their dark cloud when Henry, a golden retriever entered their lives. It is an inspiration how his parents never gave up trying to draw him into their world despite the challenges.....And all this happened in the 80s when autism was not widely recognised or accepted even in the western world.

Because I work with children, this book is very dear to me. We are seeing more children with autism these days because "mainstreaming" or 'inclusion" is encouraged for children who are high functioning and moderately social.

I'm taking my time with this book because it is so special. I believe all early childhood educators and parents should read it.

Compassion

I learned a lesson on compassion today.

Today is the day our local banking giant releases the dreaded news on who stays and who goes. I have been on tenterhooks for my girlfriend whom I have known for just over 10 months. I have always known that she's a great person - pretty, zany, sincere and God-loving. But I did not know that she has a heart of gold too.

Through our email correspondence, she shares that she is not on the retrenchment list but her unit's despatch guy will have to leave. Under the tense situation, I had expected her to heave a sigh of relief and move on.

But no, she asks rhetorically why it must be this guy to leave when he has a family and young children to feed? She would rather she got the axe because she is young and resilient; notwithstanding that her wedding is just next year and the bills are meanwhile mounting.

We all know why the despatch is asked to leave. He has worked with the bank for merely a year and he is at the lowest of the food chain. But would his leaving make any difference to the bank's bottom line?

What if pay cut is exercised instead? Can they make do with a little less and help others keep their jobs?? A pay cut for some of these guys might mean the difference between a Cartier watch and a Guess watch for Christmas but for lower level folks, getting the axe literally means the difference between food and starvation for the family.

While I thank God for answering my prayer that my friend gets to keep her job, I'm also thankful that he has also shown me what a truly beautiful friend I have. Through her, I learned that compassion comes from the heart. And like Roald Dahl, I too value kindness above all other qualities in life.

The Americans Have Decided

History is made today.

My girlfriend, who exercised her first voting rights in this presidential election, is estastic. A Singapore girl married to a New Yorker, she had contemplated moving back to Singapore with her family in tow had McCain won instead.

Obama is now the 44th president of United States. He has broken the ultimate race barrier to become the first African-American to hold the highest office in the land. But what strikes me most about him is not his race, although that has been played out in virtually every media coverage or report about the election.

To me, he stands for the courage to dream and believe. From humble beginnings and a dysfunctional family..........yes dysfunctional, President-elect Obama has shown us that nothing is impossible when you believe. As a student in Jakarta, he was asked to write an essay titled "My dream: What I want to be in the future". He had written "I want to be a president". Check out the link here

While I do not agree with all of his positions, I believe America might be happy to finally see the change they have been waiting for. Like my girlfriend and her family.