The Finish Line

A conversation I had on Friday night has entrenched itself onto my thought recesses. It has sunk its sharp claws onto the cerebral cortex and is gnawing its way into the subliminal; reflecting, probing, investigating. I know it was a ruminative question and no concrete answer was expected. Somehow, I can't help but wonder about it too.

Do nice people finish last?

Anyone who has watched 'Survivor' or 'The Apprentice' will know that beneath the fancy trappings of teamwork and camaraderie, it takes a lot of grit, determination and sometimes pure cunning to emerge the winner. It can seem like getting ahead requires putting your interests above those of others and capitalizing on the misfortune of others.

Look around us and we can see that some of the nastiest folks end up successful while those who try to abide by the rules only live mediocre lives. It does seem that the nicer you are, the harder you fall. The meaner you are, the further you get. Where's the justice here?

I have no answer for that. I only know that the immensely successful folks invariably have a certain viciousness about them. It could be the edgy outlook in life, the cold glint they wear behind their Prada shades or the hard-as-steel emotional fortitude they have painstakingly cultivated. They might be warm and nurturing in their private lives but they would never let the corporate world see that vulnerable side of their psyches. I know of people like that.

The next question is whether these people are born that way or does environment have a part to play? It's now back to the 'nature versus nurture' tango many psychologists and theorists have mulled over, researched and tried to unravel through the decades. I believe it's both genetics and environment. Our personality develops from its original genetic component. People are predisposed to have certain personality traits from birth. The environment will either augment, enhance, or stifle those natural characteristics.

I have been in situations where I did not make the right decision because I was afraid of the repercussions. Or made difficult albeit rational decisions but was later seen as unyielding. Where do we draw the line?

Whether we are predisposed to be tough or nice or whether the environment has shaped us in either direction, I believe everyone of us have our own crosses to carry......even the toughest person sometimes grapples with priorities and life-changing decisions. It is then down to a matter of prerogatives and convictions how we want to live our lives. To me, being at peace with myself is more important than how successful I become.

I also do not think that nice people finish last. They only seem to be lagging behind because they stop to reflect and help others along the way. They are in touch with their inner consciousness and they know that they will leave a legacy. They will be remembered for the lives they touched rather than the million-dollar deals they have closed.

Love Our Children

I'm attending the NAEYC convention in Washington D.C. It has been very enriching so far besides the shopping and sight-seeing!

We had the privilege of visiting some renowned preschools in the D.C. area earlier this week and learned how early childhood education is regarded here in the US. During our network lunch sessions, we understood from the locals that President Obama has a clear focus on early education quality and has given a prominent position in the President's education agenda. In fact, he's the only president who has given early childhood education any focus.

Wow, that sounds like giant steps for an industry that has always taken a backseat next to the formal schooling. It is wonderful to be in the forefront of such dynamic changes in the lives of millions of children around the world.

But as I sat at the conference hall this morning, I felt a tug at my heart strings and my mind started to wander off. The emotions just welled up as the speaker expounded on the importance of building a loving, nurturing environment for children in their early years. With so much focus on the early years' education in this country, it makes me sad to watch news of children being shot; raped and strangled in the one week we've been here. It is rather ironical to confront images of such shenanigans on TV each morning as we get ready for a conference that celebrates children.

To say this is a conflicted world is an understatement. How can people; parents in fact, do such things to their own offspring? In the case of a 5-year-old girl who was raped and strangled, it was her mother who offered her up for prostitution. What?? I hear you say. There are so many parents in this world who can't love their children enough yet there are those who are depraved at so many levels that I don't even have an adjective for them. Sigh.

Emotions aside, I still believe in the greater good of people who put their hearts and souls into working with children. People who come to school each day to make a difference to these little ones. People who nurse a scraped knee, hug a bruised soul and assure a child it's OK to make mistakes. People who do not mind the long hours, the pay or the hard work. These people are the a child's whole world and these are the people who will make a difference in this world.

NAEYC should not just celebrate children. It should celebrate teachers and everyone who loves children.

Technology, how much do I love thee?

I just experienced the woes of technology in a most amusing manner. Some people might have come undone and screamed their heads off; possibly never speaking to the 'betrayal' of their innermost confidences again but I just shrugged it off as another shenanigan of life.

I've been rather bothered by office politics at the work place.....something's definitely rotten in the state of Denmark. I sent an email to a senior colleague whom I've come to respect over the years. It was a heart-felt sharing about our corporate culture and how it's affecting people at every level.

Her reply was just as heart-felt and very edifying. I felt encouraged because I know she had gone through the same grind and has emerged stronger. She also cared enough to put aside 30 minutes of her precious time to craft an uplifting email to me, notwithstanding that it was almost the end of a busy workday.

That was where the good feeling ended. The moment I finished reading her email, another one came to my inbox bearing her sender's details. She had erroneously forwarded my original email back to me with a message to the presumed recipient that it was a confidential sharing and that I should never know that my message was shared.

Talk about a Judas moment.

I stared at my own email for a long time. Should I be upset that my confidences was just betrayed? Should I forward her the forwarded message to let her know that I knew? In the end, I did nothing except turned off the computer and left for the day.

I might have been upset if it had been someone else. But I believed she was trying to share my thoughts with someone in the organisation who could make a difference in how things worked. She could have just patronised me with a reply email and ignored the issues but she chose to take them up higher. I believe it because I trust her. Even now.

This situation could have swung both ways. Technology can make you see things in a clearer light. I choose to see mine in a positive one.

The Lions' Den

This is my first entry for April. For a moment there, I'd forgotten about my blog or rather, could not find the time or energy to pen anything. As they say....the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak...

I've been transferred to manage another centre. This time, a flagship centre with great prominence located in the heart of town. A little over a year old, it is still a beautiful setup with classy wood panelling and state-of-the-art equipment. But I'm not exactly beside myself with joy. For want of a better word, my predecessor has left a lot of unshovelled snow for me.

I'm beginning to regret my decision for the transfer. But then again, do we really have any say when management deems it appropriate to deploy its human resources? 'Talent management' and 'grooming' are words used to describe the deployment but it sure feels like a dip into the lions' den.

Can I be like Daniel to emerge unscathed or even stronger?

Meetings

I dread meetings at organisational level, especially those that span the entire day and attempt to ram information by the bus loads. I had one such meeting yesterday and came away feeling worse for wear….

The agenda:
a) Financial Update by the Finance guys
b) Operations Issues by Ops Department
c) New HR Initiatives by HR Team
d) Enrichment Programmes’ Presentation
e) Any Other Matters

f) Questions, questions, answers, answers.....

By the time we ended at 7.00pm, I was totally drained. How can corporations make their meetings less information-focused but more interactive and thus, more effective?